Never exactly sure

Blogging @ Starbucks waiting for little sister Adriana’s Violin lesson to be over. Might not finish in time. This Starbucks might be one of the stores closing I fear, since there are two Starbucks in the same outdoor mall complex. Seriously, You can see the other Starbucks from here, THE OTHER STARBUCKS! It’s not even 4 rows of cars over, an you can see it. You would think they would open one maybe on the other side of the street, at the OTHER MALL that doesn’t have ANY respectable coffeeshops…..

As a lot of people know, summer isn’t exactly my favorite season ever. Not for the heat or anything. I love summer for the heat, sun, beaches, you know, the things summer is known for. It is the things that summer isn’t usually known for, such as taking your girlfriend 200 miles away. Looking for a summer job or doing something with myself over summer (which i seem to have failed at since i don’t seem to have any incentive to do much to enrich and prolong my existence. Sad.)

But on the positive side, I have been spending more time with my family and friends, thats great. :D

Been hanging with Brandon about half the time during the week. Just going out running errands, or playing Gunbound… /oh life fail like hardcore right there/. And now Kevin joins in the picture when he isn’t working, and guess what, mostly gunbound. They make so many references to it, plus fail, that it isn’t funny anymore. Luckily for me, these guys are strong, they don’t care what other people think, as long as they’re having fun. It’s something I wish i sometimes had more of, just a little bit, that way i would be more open y’know? Oh, of course with Kevin and Brandon comes bubble tea. Hells yes. Bubble tea is the way to go in every what situation ever existed.

No… Jasmine Milk Tea with Fruity Jelly is the way to go. Anna would agree. It is our drink of choice.

With Anna and Kevin, comes hanging out with Alex, in which we did some sort of silly dance to some silly trance song in her silly room after watching some silly show like ‘I Survived a Japanese Game Show!’ and playing with her silly cat who can open doors, not so silly, but pretty awesome. That was only one night. We went ot the beach another day, that was pretty sweet, out at Alki. I’ll get some pictures up of the sunset later. We went earlier that day to shop at Costco. 30 somethings dollars on 42 hotdogs, 48 hotdog buns, 24 hamburger patties, 24 hamburger buns, and a set of Heinz condiments…. Only for me to end up with 60+ something hotdogs, 18 hambuger patties, too many buns to count, and the same amount of condiments. It was a good day, only the fact that Lake Washington on the western coast is disgusting in the water. No swimming. We set off little fire boats made from cups, sand, and tissue paper into the water at night. that was wicked awesome. going to do that every time I go to a body of water. It’s pollution, but it also has a deeper meaning to the spiritual world. The side I tend not to cross to. Lighting sent us off to go home, it was 11 at night anyways, time to pack up. Yup.

Also hung out alot with the Briz and his fiance, Amanda, which in here I will congratulate the two, since I can.

CONGRATULATIONS BRADY AND AMANDA! YOU TWO ROCK TOGETHER. no failz. :D

I’m sad, i might be in Japan for their wedding next summer, I’ll have to do something to make up for it. I’ve got a year to think about it. Maybe I’ll get them a toaster or something. He doesn’t have a toaster yet. Hehehe. Maybe a mega pack of sharpies. Been hanging out with the two a few days here and there, playing Mario Kart Wii and Portal, hecks yes. It’s been fun, more days to come I hope.

Going to pick up the little sister now… continue blogging laters. Cheers.

3 months. celebrate!

spring bling at OSU on saturday with a parking lot dance with our song.

shopping at wal mart and steak from walmart. i can pan fry steak!

pizza hut pasta for our anniversary dinner.

i’m such a romantic.

back to work..

christine, i love you babe.

the day was the 19th, but i posted a bit too late.. <3

I bought a shiny necklace for Christine. It’s a dragonfly forged from that of Silver and Turquoise. For some reason the dragonfly reminded me of her when I first saw it in the case. To her the dragonfly had some meaning to her before us, when she was a baby, her mobile that hung above her bed was of dragonflies. What a coincidence. A good one at that. I think I associate us or her with creatures that have the ability to hover, such as dragonflies and humming birds. Any insight? I’m not sure. Maybe some deep thing about relationships moving fast and a victim to that of simple changes in wind or rain, in which would be things that could throw a relationship off course. But humming birds and dragonflies have their choice to be steady and strong, calm and still against these conflicts or such. It’s just a sweet idea.

Spring break was quiet. Saw friends, spent time with family. Brandon, Brandon, Jennifer, Josh for lunches and dinners. Chinese food and XXX burger. God that was huge… I blame college for my shrunken stomach. Grahzu. I spent a day with Rachel, pretty much helped her move again, this time from Tacoma to her new apartment in Renton. Ate dinner and watched the first two Bourne movies, totally fell asleep. Hung out with the Briz and Amanda the night before, talked and caught up, played a lil Brawl. Sweet.

Left a few days early because nothing much was going on in Washington. Got down to Portland to spend time with Christine. Pho, Bubble Tea, Ice Cream, Mall, Oaks Park with Sean FS and 2 uNAVSA girls, and then Woodburn for my new awesome shoes. Etnies Arto2. Yeah.

The rest of break i pretty much spent with Christine. Moseying around, doing nothing and everything we could.

Rawr. Life’s good. Just worried about class load. Woo Hwee… Positive is that book for this term was only $6.75.

No one is here. They are, just, not here here. This is why I hate spring break. Yes, it opens up the oppertunity to come home and see friends, family, take a break from the surroundings of Eugene. Unfortunetly, people back here aren’t as free as I am. All my closest friends here are still at school, or they’re working their jobs, or two in some cases, and the time they have to spend just ‘chilling’ is near to none. Luckily, these are close friends. They made time. Tonight, off to Briz and Amanda’s. Tomorrow, Rachel. After that, I don’t know.

Monday, and it’s been quiet. I went to sleep at midnight, woke at 11, just continuous uninterrupted sleep. Nothing to hug, nothing to hold, no one to talk to. How boring. I spent the hour or two texting to Christine, talking talking then convincing convincing her to go to sleep. She needs it, her allergies kicked in when we went to Albertson that other night after Florence. Stupid massive displays of flowers. We rushed over to Wal Mart after we noticed her sneezing got worse and she got itchy. That night we were going to stay up all night to put pictures on poster board. She crashed right when we got back home, the medicine had kicked in, hard. I didn’t mind, I was worried that the itching was going to drive her crazy, and was glad that she had fallen asleep so the itching wouldn’t be on her mind as much.

She went to the doctors today, maybe for stronger medicines more specified to her needs. She just texted me, at least I won’t be as bored now as I have been. I haven’t done much today. Woke up around eleven as I said before. Ate some lunch my grandma had prepared for the family, and came back upstairs and sat around. Watched some Justice League, but thats just to keep my mind from going insane and knocking my head into the wall out of boredom. Rachel called sometime around, going to see her again tomorrow night. Finally. It’s been months without seeing my best friend, or talking. I suck at talking on the phone, she’s usually working. So our phone conversations usually end up being increments of 5-10 minutes of us just moving along in our life, the other just listening. I find it comforting sometimes, it’s almost like in middle school and high school, when I would go over to her house to just chill, and she would have her chores to do. Sometimes she had to do them herself, so I would just sit there, and listen to her talk about her day, or some stupid boy at school, or maybe about the family. Other times I would be there with her, helping her, hoping to lighten her work load. She’s strong, you have no idea.

Now she’s working two jobs, every day, in two cities an hour away from each other. And I don’t know if she even juggles school in there. It’s been too long. She’s a bit sick now, just needs a break and some sleep. That’s her tonight, sleep. Tomorrow night, I don’t think we’ll do much, just sit back and be there together, watch a movie. Thats how we work.

I should do my taxes, My mom got me TaxCut Premium Federal. It’s suppose to make it really easy. I guess it would. I don’t have much to input. Only two jobs, they’re not even major. I wonder what the outcome will be.

Dentist tomorrow. They’re going to say I haven’t flossed much, and truth be told, I haven’t. Very sparingly I guess. My gums hate me, It’s my fault. I should floss more.

Boy. It’s quiet here. Ridiculous.

At three in the morning of March 20th, Christine and I were no where near Eugene. No, we were in Florence, OR. In the shadow of the night and lite by a partially hidden full moon, we left Eugene at 2:00am after browsing the local 24 hr Wal-Mart. Paying 10 dollars in gas, we drove on 126 through the country side, some small towns, and a few sidewinders up to an elevation of 764ft. We reached Florence at around three, and drove through the back roads of dunes for a bit till we hit a sign saying something along the lines of ‘Pass this point or we’ll arrest you.’ After being threatened by a sign, we turned around, and drove back into town. Found a nice motel, parked in the back, and slept for three hours.

The drive back to Eugene was shorter for some reason. I was driving the speed limit now (plus or minus 5… 10…). We passed by a bus that had caught on fire, and a crowd of kids standing, waiting for the back up bus.

Spontaneous of a trip really? I had just finished working with team HAAK for the day, it was midnight. I picked up my girlfriend, and then we were off. On our epic journey to the west coast. I love my girlfriend for her spontaneous nature, she gives me courage to do these things.

Good night. Good way to end winter term 2008.

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/anti_mind_virus.png

damn you xkcd

edit: i took down the img, and left the link. It was stupid of me to leave it up. It hurts my head everytime i look at my own page.

Before Christine, Wednesdays were the high point of the week because it meant my week was more than half way over, and Thursday were the last day. Now they are days where I see her the least out of the week, making them longer than usual.

suckie.

Usually my blogs are private, hidden, only allowed certain friends to see my life written in words.

Back in the age of Xanga, middle school, that was all close friends, and of course, back then, blog rings. Communicating my emotions and feelings out to random strangers back then was comforting, even if it would have been a disturbing thought to my parents, I never shared enough about myself. It was like a story of a middle schooler’s roller coaster ride with his parents reigning over him, and friends being the force kind of tearing him out of his turtle shell. It was nice to talk to some strangers. I got smart later on, more privacy was needed…

Livejournal, full friend screen and privacy. Just high school friends, and a certain amount of people I’ve gotten to known over the years online, few mainly from the West Coast. An epic journal they were, two I think. Wrote about everything. Everything.

Now, here I am, WordPress. I’ve gone public, but it’s hard to tell who I am.

The only difference between now and then, is that this blog is public, Facebook public. I can’t write about everything, girls in general. Especially about Christine. Haha. It wouldn’t be right if she I wrote about her about stuff she didn’t know I felt. I like to be one 1 on 1. And the since the history is public, less story telling. Sorry punks.

The thing is, I’m not exactly sure what I’m going to write about right now… I’ve been too busy.

I just hope I’m not a shitty uh, other. Exclusive as of now, but the thing I worry about is my life will push everything else out. I barely had a social life last year between IWN and studio, imagine how I’m going to be this year. Harder studio, higher and bigger position in ISA/IWN. Geeze, will i end up spending more time worrying than with her? I need to sort myself out, only if i could find time to do so… I’m in lecture right now. Haha…

It’s true, you can’t. Yet I will always try. I don’t know know why, but it just feels like I’m responsible in some way to be their sun no matter how dark the matter may be. And if I can’t be the sun, maybe just be there to share the pain. It is never as bad as suffering alone. They say misery loves company, it is not a thing of selflessness, but just a thing of human insecurity. It’s a promise, damn well promise. It’s who I am, I can’t help it. But if you don’t allow me, well, I just get sad myself.I will, and always will, take upon the responsibility to do my best to uplift people’s pain to the best of my ability.

I just hope I’ll never be the cause of it.

You have no idea how happy I am. After studying for almost 3 days straight in attempt to memorize/learn 72 buildings ranging from the 1400’s to the 1800’s in Italy, France, Germany, Austria, America. One too many effin architects, too many dates, and hell knows how many periods and things that were changed and copied from every era. Seriously, my brain died this morning. But it’s okay. My confidence was boosted this morning when I think I did a really good job on a midterm that I didn’t even study for, but sat in class and drifted off every once in a while. Human Context, lot of common sense and theory based. I personally think I did really well, and wouldn’t have gotten off any better if I studied for it. But Art History, oh gawd. After memorizing a majority of 80 some buildings, like 6 eras, 400 years, I only used maybe 6 buildings on the midterm. Whatever, I think I would’ve only done that good if I studied that much. So very much thanks to Kody for helping me. Very much lot of so.

Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo…